Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Shirley B. Personal Testimony 3

Don't tell God how big your storm is. Tell the storm how big your God is!!

From 2000-2003 I was at my spiritual peak. I was praying for spiritual growth constantly, "GOD take me as high spiritually as I am capable of" was my daily prayer. I wanted to know the mind of GOD. I wanted to connect more than I had ever desired. By 2003 I felt as if I had so much love and peace that it sometimes scared me to think on it. In the fall of 2003 I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer.No family history. No smoking. No real risk factors. It was a challenge and a hurdle....

It was a NIGHTMARE. I remembered making this statement to a friend a few months earlier "I have nothing I can't get rid of" This was going to make that statement resonate in my mind for many months because I lost 2 things I had never considered losing and really never considered them of value until that moment.

There was much to endure and the bad just got worse. The hardest part was watching how the deterioration of my physical body was also hurting the ones I loved. The mental agony was unbearable at times, but I found strength in what I already knew. I knew what God's word said and I was certain I was his child but the medicine would prove to overcome reason at times and I could not pray.

I lost so much weight that at one point I weighted 98#'s. My husband looked at me through tears one night and said "You can't die". I didn't know what to say, I just said I won't. But would I? At that time it was about 4 months into my illness I realized that I was in a BAD STORM. I began to cry out to GOD. "You've got to get me through this, Help me!" Show me what to tell my husband.

I was home alone sitting in my comfortable chair in despair when GOD sent me a vision. This is what he said/did:
The day was sunny and beautiful, I was outside and the Lord walked up to me, reached out his hand to me and said come. I took his hand and we walked a bit the sun and wind felt do wonderful on my face. He led me to a huge FIRE, the flames were everywhere. When I looked at him, we laughed and he bend down so I could get on his back, AND HE carried me on his back through the fire with the flames all around us-WE LAUGHED. On the other side he sat me down and faded away.
That was my confirmation that he would carry me through, but the biggest thing was I wasn't afraid of a storm actually I love a storm that's why he showed me a fire. I am afraid of fire and it was worse than I thought. It was the most wonderful experience and I felt such peace. Later that day I went back to my bible as I did frequently during the day and as I allowed it to fall open it opened to Judges, my eyes fell on a verse I had never noticed. This is what it said "Thou shalt not die".
I just began thanking the LORD. I couldn't wait until my husband came home to tell him. And I held on to that until it came to pass.

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